***Ok, I am guilty of blog stalking and I found this on a blog of someone I don't have the foggiest idea who they are, but I loved this and so I stole it. Does that make me a bad person?!! Hope you get a good laugh, I sure did!!***
Rules of Men
We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the men in our lives. Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Men ARE not mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport...and no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work!Strong hints do not work!Obvious hints do not work!Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
Got to love our men!!!
5 comments:
Loved this! I just don't want to show it to my husband. I can still get away with the crying blackmail thing and I want to keep it that way as long as possible. Lauryn sleeping Naked. I love that too, she really is adverturous
I Love it!!!! :)
This is SO true, just don't let the guys know. I might have to kipe this for my blog, so many would get a kick!
Okay my dear, I have to say that this actually does apply to ALL men. No exceptions. I laughed my head off, and then sighed knowing just how much of an admission that would be on my part. We love you and the kids, and I promise to call shortly, certainly before Ty strangles me for still not calling. He is better about that than me, obviously.
Loved it! Thanks for a good laugh!
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